It’s said that a different version of you exists in the minds of everyone you ever met. This was highlighted to me again today when my husband told me I’m always angry lately!!
🤷♀️ Initially I was incredulous; I should probably point out I’m the happiest and most hopeful for a fabulous future for our family unit than I have ever been in my life. I have been actively trying to respond differently to him (& others) because the penny finally dropped after all the memes,self help pod casts & reading, “you cannot change another person or situation, only how you respond to them!” Fundamentally you are responsible for yourself and you alone!
Then it struck me, regardless of how I feel, I can’t deny him his opinion, his perception of me must be entirely valid because it’s his truth!.. life as he sees it.
I probably have been preoccupied with my thoughts, work, the kids, building the aforementioned future but where I believed I radiated positivity & love while doing it, he perceives anger, I’m at a bit of a loss 🤷♀️
I’m having a cut back/deload week in the exercise department, I often do less strength work when I’m training for longer runs or cut back the running when I’m looking to build strength but not usually both at once (unless I’m pregnant & there’s no chance of that ever again,my youngest is 7 on Halloween & I was pretty elderly to be having a baby even then 🤪) it’s possible I might be a little touchy but I honestly didn’t think I was & even patted myself on the back a bit learning to take time off 🤣
My oldest daughter C, much mentioned in previous blog posts I won’t bore you with the details believes I’m always positive, she rings me for perky pep talks, to talk her down or up from 1 dilemma or another.
El daughter no 2, says people ask her if she’s my daughter when she’s at work in a niche pub, they say we’re very alike both in looks & our neuro diversity (my husband says we’re nothing at all alike, another example of the perception thing I guess, though he and her father aren’t exactly friendly shall we say & he sees her as a tiny version of him.) And that I’m always rushing! This point I do agree with, so much to do, places to go, busy busy.
2 of my friends described me recently as amazing, which was lovely actually but it was hard to believe, why is it so difficult to believe the nice things people say? I was going to say it’s easier to believe the nasty but I wasn’t very ready to believe I was angry either so maybe it’s just hard to believe we don’t project what we’re feeling, we know how we feel so it should be obvious to others but why should it? I mean really, most of my children have some form of autism with or without ADD,ADHD or dyspraxia & you simple cannot fool them, it’s not like a baby or a pet, you can’t use a nice voice & say any old thing in that tone regardless of the words to get a positive response. They feel in their soul if you’re agitated, anxious, unhappy & are immediately uncomfortable no matter how placating the words coming out of your mouth, although they probably wouldn’t be able to differentiate between sadness, disappointment or anger, much like their father apparently, they feel the change in energy & fear it because it’s not their normal.
Enough of my ramblings for the day, I’m going to ponder how to radiate the joy of my wonderful life better & plan a decent run for Saturday to put the world to right!
G’nite folks A x
#positivelife #perceptioniseverything #middleagedread #agewisely #bekind #positivepantson #myamazingfuture